GREAT LOVE ISN’T LUCK
IT’S A PRACTICE
Most couples work jumps straight to the pattern that's on fire. The Great Love Framework starts with your whole story, and finishes with a practice you keep, while Emotionally Focused Therapy powers the middle.
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It's rarely the big things that undo a couple. It happens in the small moments. The same argument, the same distance, the same quiet feeling of not being met. Without a way to understand the pattern, you're left blaming each other for something neither of you chose.
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Developed by clinical psychologist Dr. Sue Johnson, EFT is an evidence-based approach to couples therapy that focuses on understanding relationship patterns, emotional safety, and attachment. Rather than teaching “communication skills” alone, it helps couples see the cycle they get caught in under stress, understand the emotions and needs driving that cycle, and learn how to reach for each other in ways that create more security and closeness.
It is one of the most researched approaches in couples therapy. Research shows 70 to 75 percent of couples move from distress to recovery, most within 10 to 12 sessions. The first and last phases are uniquely mine.
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ICEEFT Certification is a formal process overseen by the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy, the body that trains and credentials EFT therapists worldwide.
The path is deliberately thorough. It starts with a four day externship, then dozens of hours of core skills training, then supervision with a Certified EFT Supervisor. Recordings of a therapist’s own session work are submitted, along with a written case conceptualisation, for ICEEFT to assess and see how the therapist work with a couple in sessions.
I’m an ICEEFT Certified EFT Supervisor and Therapist. I’ve been through this process myself, and I now support other therapists as they go through it too.
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Wherever you are, whether the beginning, the drift, or the reckoning, the framework meets you there. For couples in crisis, couples who have drifted, couples about to marry, and couples who simply want to keep what they have built.
THE PATH TO GREAT LOVE
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PHASE ONE: UNDERSTAND THE RELATIONSHIP
The Relationship Map. From confusion to clarity.
Before we look at what's going wrong, we map the whole of you, not just the pattern that's on fire. Where your story began and the chapters that shaped it. The strengths you already have to build on. The deeper wounds, from this relationship and long before it. And the dreams each of you has quietly held for where this could go. Most couples work skips straight to the problem. We start here. -
PHASE TWO: RECONNECT WITH EACH OTHER
Powered by EFT. From disconnection to connection.
This is where Emotionally Focused Therapy does the heavy lifting. EFT is the leading evidence based model for couples, and here we use it to calm the cycle you're caught in, reach the emotion sitting underneath it, and help you turn toward each other instead of away. This is the work that rebuilds the bond. Your tool for home: The Decode. -
PHASE THREE: START BUILDING THE GREAT LOVE
The Practice. From surviving to flourishing. This is the phase most couples never reach, because therapy so often ends the moment you understand your cycle. But understanding is not the same as living differently. Here we build the practice: a shared vision of what you're creating, choices made on purpose rather than by default, the small rituals that keep you connected, and a way to move through the next hard season without losing your footing. This is where insight becomes habit.
THE DECODE
Think of this as your tool for the hard moments. When a conversation starts going sideways and you can feel it slipping, The Decode gives you four simple steps to catch what's really happening and turn it around. It takes a minute, you can do it anywhere, and it can change how the whole argument ends.
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In a hard moment, catch the story running in your head. The one that says they don't care, or they always do this. That story is the trigger, not the truth.
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Before you react, question it. Is the story actually true, or is it an old fear speaking? More often than not, it's the fear.
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Instead of reacting, check it with your partner. Tell them what you made it mean, and ask if it's real. This is the moment the cycle starts to break.
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Now reach. With the story named and softened, you can turn toward each other instead of away. This is connection, rebuilt in real time.
