The method
Emotionally Focused Therapy
EFT is the approach I use with every client. It’s what I’m trained and certified in, and now supervise other therapists in. It’s also one of the most researched approaches to couples therapy there is.
Couples therapy in Wodonga and online across Australia.
Work with meWhat EFT is
The fight is rarely about the fight
Under stress, couples fall into a pattern. One of you reaches harder, the other steps back further, and each move makes the other’s more likely. Underneath it, you’re usually both asking the same thing: are you there for me?
Developed by clinical psychologist Dr. Sue Johnson, EFT is an evidence-based approach to couples therapy that focuses on understanding relationship patterns, emotional safety, and attachment. Rather than teaching “communication skills” alone, it helps couples see the cycle they get caught in under stress, understand the emotions and needs driving that cycle, and learn how to reach for each other in ways that create more security and closeness.
It is one of the most researched approaches in couples therapy. Research shows 70 to 75 percent of couples move from distress to recovery, most within 10 to 12 sessions.
How EFT works
Three stages, one bond
Every couple moves through these three stages, at their own pace. Each one builds on the one before it.
Stage one · De-escalation
Calm the cycle
We map the pattern you get caught in, slow it down, and find what’s sitting underneath it. This is usually where the first shift happens: the fights get shorter, and you start to see the pattern coming before it takes over.
Stage two · Restructuring
Reshape the bond
With the cycle calmer, each of you starts to share the softer emotion underneath, the fear or the need, with your partner responding. This is where you learn to reach for each other in new ways, emotionally and sexually.
Stage three · Consolidation
Make it hold
We take the new pattern back to the old problems that used to derail you, and build the habits that keep you close once therapy ends.
Working with me
Session by session
What happens, in what order. It’s a guide, not a promise. Every couple moves at their own pace, and the plan follows you.
Before we start
Questionnaire
One each, before we meet.
Session 1
Your love story
How you met, what drew you together, and when things started to shift.
Sessions 2 & 3
Your own story
Time with each of you, one-on-one.
Session 4
Goals and the cycle
What you want, and the pattern getting in the way.
Sessions 5 & 6
Where you learned to love
The blueprint each of you grew up with.
Session 7 on
Calming the cycle
Slowing the pattern down, so it stops running the show.
Session 10
Tracking progress
You both retake the questionnaire, so I can check we’re heading toward your goals.
From there
Reshaping the bond
Sharing the softer feelings underneath, and reaching for each other in new ways.
Toward the end
Making it hold
Setting up connection rituals, and a shared vision for what’s next.
Why me
A certified EFT therapist
ICEEFT Certification is a formal process overseen by the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy, the body that trains and credentials EFT therapists worldwide.
The path is deliberately thorough. It starts with a four day externship, then dozens of hours of core skills training, then supervision with a Certified EFT Supervisor. Recordings of a therapist’s own session work are submitted, along with a written case conceptualisation, for ICEEFT to assess and see how the therapist works with a couple in sessions.
I’m an ICEEFT Certified EFT Supervisor and Therapist. I’ve been through this process myself, and I now support other therapists as they go through it too.
Who it’s for
Why couples come to see me
Couples therapy in Wodonga and online across Australia, for couples working through any of these.
- 01The same arguments, on repeat
- 02Feeling more like housemates than partners
- 03Communication that keeps breaking down
- 04Rebuilding trust after an affair or betrayal
- 05Trauma that’s showing up in your relationship
- 06Navigating neurodiversity together
- 07Sex and intimacy that’s dropped off or feels hard
- 08Making something good even better
All couples welcome, including same-sex and LGBTQIA+ couples. You both need to be willing to come, even if one of you is less sure than the other.
Engaged, or about to be? Before Forever was made for you.
Before foreverIt might not be the right fit yet if
- There’s current family violence or a safety risk. That needs specialised support first.
- Either of you is in an acute mental health crisis or active, untreated addiction. That needs to settle first, so the relationship work can hold.